About me :D

I'm Sarah, i'm 14. I'm a reasonably nice person, until you fuck things up with me. I'm known to think too much; good thing or not, depends on the situation. I like places where i can forget about everything and block out the screaming noises of everyday problems that run through my head, as i believe silence speaks the truth and i would rather not face up to that just yet. I love being with people who make me feel safe, it's my favourite thing in the world. Don't fuck me around. I like people who express honesty towards me and actually tell me what they are thinking, do that and i'll completely adore you. I never think before I act, chances are that’s the key to the problems. Kind of like a Algebraic equation, without knowing what ‘A’ or ‘B’ Equates to, ‘X’ is just a placeholder for something I’ll eventually figure out. I never do, I dance around ideas, holding tiny little philosophies dear to me. Never thinking ahead, never understanding what might come of the loss of attention to the situation at hand. Never, Until the world crumbles beneath us, shattering our once pleasant hopes of others finding our secret. Looking back, in every instance of my life up until now, I can honestly say. “ I never concerned myself with feelings, ideas, perceptions, judgments, consequences or regrets”. I never thought that one day I will die, and all I will leave behind is a legacy of lies, forgotten dreams, and cruel marks. I’ve always looked to the future with a hope a child has, a sleepless Christmas eve hope, that someone will bring me the things I want without having to actually work for them. Christmas as a metaphor.Seems like I’ve never paid enough attention to greatness to grow from it, just enough to understand what people see in it. I hate people, But I love conversation. This little part of me see’s horrible things in groups of people, you see people have eyes, that stare, lips that talk, and minds that judge. In a conversation, all judgement and fake love is thrown aside, to really connect with someone’s soul. When you converse, you share ideas, memories and thoughts. You don’t read a person to form your opinion, you have it and you share it. That to me breaks the barrier of distant people. I don’t like strangers, and everyone I have never had a conversation with is a stranger to me. I don’t write like most people, I use grammar as if it was a speech tool, and don’t care if im right or wrong, I write to express. I don’t work paragraphs right, and don’t really mind. I am not a writer, my words have no logical form, they are thoughts on paper, and no one can tell me otherwise. I find comfort in my misery, drowning myself in worries, because somewhere down the line someone cares, and I know they do. I have many friends who would do anything to make me feel better, and sometimes I need to test that, I need to know it. I find a certain comfort in knowing if I hit rock bottom, someone can pick me up. I rarely cry, truly cry I mean. I can fake it at the drop of a hat, but rarely do I let myself open up and scream it all out. I’ve always dreamed of changing the world, somehow making people realize that life is not about war, hatred, money or power, that its about love, but i don't see that ever happening. I absolutely hate Tokio Hotel & love learning about religion although feel no intension in believing in it. My answer to all of your religions is that you're all right. Life is exactly what you make it and when you really think about it, it's all about you. You the hero of your own little story that plays till you die. So God exists, but God may be just what you thought He/She/it was. The creator and the creation itself. The essence of the universe. So whether Jesus Christ returns to gather His people or a bunch of aliens come to save or destroy us or we simply continue until the Earth withers and the sun explodes and we're all swallowed by a black hole it is and will always be as you say it is, you will face it, whatever it is, soon enough. Ramble on, continue to repeat your selves in your sermons and debates and it will not change a thing, your wasting your time, money and breath. Everything has been said before. Its in a book if you have to say it, just say it in your head. I also have a deep addiction to iced coffees (: